How to Get Your Lady into Shooting: An Incomplete Guide

As you might already know–despite certain popular opinions–men and women are different in a few key ways. Among them? Most men seem to be born with a love for blowing stuff up and destroying targets. For women, it's a bit of an acquired taste. Here's a few ways you can teach her to embrace her dangerous warrior side a little more and learn to love it.

My (John Lovell's) wife recently spent the afternoon with some of her friends at the outdoor range near our home. This is not a typical way for women to spend the afternoon together–drawing pistols and tearing up targets down range–but these women were having a blast (pun intended).

They didn't flinch. They didn't seem surprised that triggers make booms. They knew how to safely and effectively draw, present, fire their appendix-concealed weapons. And these were not manly women.

These were child-raising, Target browsing (pun also intended) ladies, and up until a few years ago, many of them had never regularly fired a weapon. And here they were that day shredding that paper and making me hurt for any would-be attacker who crossed their paths.

If You Want Her to Pick Up a Gun, Begin with "Why?"

Maybe to you it's obvious why a woman should carry and learn how to use a firearm, but maybe it's not to her. So, help her understand why it's important to you that she learn to defend herself with lethal force.

It's sexy and effective. Maybe you find it hot when your woman becomes more deadly. Ok. That's a start. But also, you're not always going to be around to protect her and the kids, and sometimes the world can be a scary place for the women and children out there.

A shared responsibility. Learning how to operate a pistol or other weapon isn't just the man's job. And teaching the kids to have a healthy and, hopefully, tactically skilled relationship with firearms should also be her responsibility, too.

A great start to a good date night. It can be a bonding experience if you do it right. She may never geek out on weapons, accessories, and tactics the way you do, but she can learn to defend herself and have fun with you in the process.

Because guns! I understand. Guns are cool. The pew pews are exhilerating. "Shooting stuff fun go boom!" I get it. It's also ingrained in my reptile brain. Her reptile brain, though, may not gravitate toward the Chicago way of getting Capone. But if she has the tools and the skills to use them, you never know what she might accomplish when her mama bear awakens.

If You Want Her to Pick Up a Gun, Begin Slowly

If your woman seems hesitant about guns, you might start with a conversation. Remove the magazine. Clear the chamber. Have her hold it. Schedule a date with her at the local outdoor range.

Lots of fun, zero intimidation. Guns can be pretty intimidating, especially for someone who's never shot one. I recommend starting at an outdoor range because things are spread out and the boom doesn't echo off the walls. Of course, even at the outdoor range, ear protection and guns that are easy to manage are a must. You want her to enjoy it and return with you in the future, so making it fun and removing the intimidation factor are key.

Good, patient instruction. Maybe you feel confident in your teaching ability and your patience when it comes to teaching your loved ones how to shoot. If not, maybe the two of you can enroll in a training course together. Either way, though, it's important for your lady to learn and practice the fundamentals for safe and effective shooting. And she needs to learn and practice these things in a low-pressure environment. That could make or break her shooting career.

A little practice + several weeks = results she can see and enjoy. You've had your first range date. 30 minutes, maybe an hour, of shooting. Burger at Chili's. A two-hour Rom Com. Etc. And now you want her to really learn. Begin with safety of course. Clearing the magwell and chamber. Checking, double checking, triple checking. Show her how to draw and present. 

Teach her the fundamentals of easing and squeezing the trigger so she learns her gun's prep and reset tolerances. Let her get comfortable with the noise and recoil. Also, enjoy spending time with her and be grateful that she decided to do a repeat range date with you.

RELATED POSTS | Learn Your Triggers • Train Your Shooting Eyes • Gun Safety at Home • Choosing the Ideal Conceal Carry

If You Want Her to Pick Up a Gun, Join Her in Real-World Scenario Training

As you know, being able to draw and shoot accurately is difficult enough in a controlled environment. But to become really effective and safe with her weapon, she needs to understand what it's like to defend under duress.

For this kind of training, you might begin with establish a dry fire space and routine at your home.

Learn tactical, real-world shooting together. If you go beyond this into life-fire tactical training (and you should) make sure you choose a reputable, highly experienced trainer who can provide the building blocks of proper technique in a safe, controlled setting. You don't want her to have to re-learn down the road because a trainer passed on his or her bad (perhaps even dangerous) habits.

Related WPS Training Courses | Pistol 1 • Pistol 2 • Pistol 3

If You Want Her to Pick Up a Gun, Let Her Customize and Accessorize

We all love accessories, right? Some of us like cute watches, earrings, and turquoise necklaces. Others of us like to build out our rail systems and upgrade our red dots. I'm not saying which gender enjoys which. That would be sexist. I'm just saying, accessories can really spice things up, and she might enjoy that pink Glock that seems a little more balanced in her hand than the Desert Eagle you've been eyeing. 

Whenever you begin this next chapter of the journey, you'll want to make sure she has the right tool for her skill level and recoil management ability. The right sized pistol and some choice accessories can really help your cause.

Of course your relationship is much more important than her fire arms skill, so that's probably useful to remember. But if she can learn some skills, have some fun, and y'all can enjoy training on this stuff together, I think you'll both be grateful down the road that you took this journey together–and stayed together.

Train Hard. Train Smart. Happy Wife Happy Life. Live Free.